Wednesday, May 28, 2008

Totally Freaking Out

Today is the fourth day that I have POAS. I was trying not to be too worried that the tests weren't getting any darker. But today it was even lighter--a very very very faint line. It was my last test, and I was panicked.

It was 6 a.m. when I took the test. My last test, because I figured that once I had my beta I could stop obsessively peeing on expensive sticks every day. But I was so freaked out by the results that I dragged some clothes off and ran out to the grocery store (which luckily opens at 6) to buy another test.

I think I'm actually going insane. I can't believe I did that. And it's not like the second test was any better.

I know a pee-stick test is just an IF-you're-pregnant test, not a HOW-pregnant-are-you test. But I can't help but think this is very bad. If multiple tests are showing less HCG than the ones from two days ago, isn't that a sign that my beta is not doubling?

I asked my nurse this morning when she took my blood, and she said it doesn't mean anything. But I'm not sure I believe her.

I'm losing my mind.


Io said...

Oh honey, try to keep it together a little while longer. It might just be that you drank too much last night and it was diluted or something.
If that was a stupid annoying thing to say then ignore that and I'll just send you a big hug.

When will they call you? This afternoon?

the Babychaser: said...

Yeah, I get the call this afternoon. It might not tell me much. If the number's very high I won't be so worried. But if it's pretty low then I won't really know anything until I test again on Friday.

Have I mentioned how bad this sucks.

BTW, I love that you have googlereader. I can always count on you to comment right away! It's comforting. :-)

Sue said...

Waiting for the beta results is so hard. I'm sorry this is so stressful for you - I'll be thinking of you today as you wait for the call.

kate said...

Yes, just try to keep in mind that those are "Am-I-pregnant" sticks, not "What's-my-beta" sticks. I have read a shit ton of information about the total lack of consistency even among a single brand of pregnancy test, so the variations are probably normal.

I will be on pins and needles waiting to hear what the doc says when you get your call.

Joonie said...

Oh, this is so difficult, but you're down to the last few hours waiting for the results of your Beta. Try to occupy your time with something else (I know it's easier said that done), but you're almost there.
Sending you positive thought and wishes for a strong beta result!

beautycourage said...

I agree with the others- the darkness of the line makes no difference, there are too many variables. Hang in there today, I'll be thinking of you! I think the wait before "the call" is the WORST time of the whole process. I really do.

Malloryn said...

This waiting must be SO freaking hard! I'll be thinking about you and hoping for good news.

Shinejil said...

Damn, I'd be certifiable. I really hope that right about now, you're hearing a nice high number through the receiver.

This really sucks, Babychaser.